⏳ Estimated Reading Time: 6–7 minutes

Most change efforts fail because leaders don’t recognize what they’re actually up against. This article breaks down the four stages of resistance—and how to lead through each one without losing your clarity, your purpose, your momentum, or yourself.

Every change leader encounters it. Most don’t survive it.

There’s a pattern that shows up any time someone dares to shift how things work inside an organization.

This isn’t covered in any manual—but if you’ve ever challenged the status quo, you’ve felt the response.

It doesn’t discriminate by role, title, or position. The dynamic is the same. The only difference is how directly it shows up—and how hard it pushes back.

It’s resistance.

And it follows a sequence.

It starts quietly—then gets louder.

Stage 1: Ignore & Discredit

At first, it’s like your message doesn’t even land.

You speak up about what’s not working. What do you get? Polite nods. Quick pivots. Or silence. And it’s maddening—becau...

⏳ Estimated Reading Time: 6–7 minutes

Why Accountability Fails: The Responsibility Crisis in Leadership

Is accountability driving performance in your team—or stifling ownership? What’s meant to inspire action often turns talented people into passive bystanders.

A coaching client of mine was leading an agile transformation, but their team was struggling with clarity and alignment. Their first instinct? Create a RACI model—a document mapping out who was responsible, accountable, consulted, and informed for each task.

Instead of fostering ownership, the structure backfired. People stayed in their lanes and waited for instructions—doing only what was assigned, nothing more.
Despite their efforts, they had unknowingly created an environment of compliance rather than ownership. Agile techniques alone weren’t enough—a real mindset shift wasn’t happening.

Accountability-driven cultures don’t create ownership—they create hesitation. If your team waits for direction instead of stepping up, t...

One conversation can change everything.

The phone rings. You expect just another call. Instead, a single sentence shatters your reality—your future, rewritten in an instant.

You can’t always control what happens. But you can always control what comes next. I don’t just believe this—I’ve lived it.

When Life Throws a Curveball

Twenty years ago, I thought I was on the right path. Then, out of nowhere, I lost my job. One conversation and it was gone—the career I had built was erased in an instant.

At first, I froze. My mind raced with worst-case scenarios. The panic was so consuming that I got lost on my drive home—on a route I had driven for over five years. That’s how disoriented I was. The weight of uncertainty was crushing.

But then, through the noise of my thoughts, a single realization broke through:

I still have a choice.

I could stay stuck in frustration, or I could take control. My wife, friends, and family reminded me of who I was. And in that moment, I decided:

This set...

Have you ever made a snap decision that felt right in the moment but later turned out to be completely wrong? Or spent too much time overanalyzing something trivial?

Welcome to the reality of how your brain actually works.

Daniel Kahneman’s Thinking, Fast and Slow, breaks down the science of decision-making, revealing why even the smartest leaders fall into cognitive traps. It all comes down to two competing thinking systems that run the show: one is lightning-fast and intuitive, and the other is slow and deliberate. Both are essential. And both can trip you up in ways you don’t even realize.

System 1: Your Brain’s Autopilot (Fast, but Often Wrong)

System 1 is your gut reaction. It’s the part of your brain that jumps to conclusions, fills in gaps, and makes rapid-fire decisions without conscious effort.

It’s why you instinctively know someone is angry just by hearing their tone and why you can complete the phrase "peanut butter and..." without thinking. And why you assume a higher...

Some books don’t just land in your lap—they grab you and refuse to let go. In 2024, that’s what happened when I picked up The Dark Side of the Light Chasers by Debbie Ford.

I’ll be honest—I didn’t stumble upon this book alone. My coach and mentor, Paul Martinelli, told me, “You need to read this.” He had that look that said, Trust me, this one will mess with you—in the best way possible.

I wasn’t prepared for what followed.

This book challenged and wrecked me.

And I’m not exaggerating. It took me months to get through, which is crazy because I can usually knock out a book in a week or so. But this one? It wouldn’t let me speed through. Every chapter was like a mirror, reflecting things I wasn’t ready to see. Some days, I had to put it down, take a deep breath, and say, Not today, Debbie.

But avoiding it didn’t make it go away. Eventually, I had to face the uncomfortable truth: The parts of myself I was resisting were the very things holding me back.

The Power of the Shadow

Ford ...

Have you ever felt like you’re running in circles? You’re busy—so busy you barely have time to think—but at the end of the day, you wonder what you actually accomplished. I’ve been there. If this resonates with you, you need to pick up Greg McKeown’s Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less.

This book made my top two reads of 2024 for a reason: it’s not just a book. It’s a call to action to simplify your life and align your choices with what truly matters. Let’s dive into why Essentialism hit home for me and how it can transform your life, too.

What Is Essentialism Really About?

At its core, Essentialism is about getting crystal clear on what’s most important—and unapologetically letting go of everything else. It’s about doing less but doing it better. McKeown doesn’t sugarcoat it: most of us are spending too much time on things that don’t matter. And it’s costing us the energy, focus, and satisfaction of pursuing what does.

Here are some key takeaways:

• The Power of Choic...

If you have ever worked in or collaborated with an Information Technology (IT) department, there’s a not-so-little secret: their emotional intelligence (EI) is shockingly low. This isn’t some minor flaw. It’s threatening the core of the tech industry’s productivity, creativity, sanity, and ultimately, their usage and employment. Yet, bizarrely, managers keep turning a blind eye to this festering issue. It’s time to drag this problem into the spotlight and dissect why this negligence is irresponsible and downright dangerous.

The Emotional Intelligence Deficit
Let’s get real: many tech professionals are masters of logical thinking, problem-solving, and technical wizardry but are hopelessly inept when it comes to emotional intelligence. EI, which includes self-awareness, empathy, and people skills, is crucial for any healthy work environment. But these “soft skills” are often considered superfluous in the tech world, where code and data are supreme.

Why EI is Low in Tech Departments

...

In the relentless hustle of business, productivity, and efficiency often steal the spotlight. But Christine Porath’s TED Talk, “Why being respectful to your coworkers is good for business,” flips the script. Porath, a professor at Georgetown University and a workplace civility guru, explains why respect and kindness aren’t just soft skills—they’re critical to business success.

Her evidence-backed insights challenge the usual corporate playbook and offer a fresh perspective on what it takes to build a thriving workplace. Let’s dive into the key points from her talk and see how respect can boost your bottom line.

The Hidden Costs of Being a Jerk
Porath kicks things off by laying bare the hidden costs of workplace incivility. Her research shows that disrespect leads to disengaged employees, lower productivity, and higher turnover. When people face or witness rude behavior, they’re more likely to check out mentally, slack off, or jump ship.

Key Takeaway: Being a jerk at work is expensive...

Welcome to the jungle of corporate motivation, where the strongest survive and the weak...well, they just quit. So, let’s dive into the murky waters of motivation and leadership. Whether you’re an emerging leader finding your footing or an established leader looking to refine your approach, the harsh reality is that motivation is an inside job. You can’t inject it into your team like a caffeine shot on a Monday morning.

Motivation: The Myth of External Drive

Motivation is personal. It’s internal. You can’t package it up and hand it out with paychecks. This brings us to a brutally honest truth: You don’t motivate people. You hire motivated people. That might sound dismissive, but once you understand that motivation is not yours to give, it starts to make sense.

Creating the Right Environment: Are You Fueling or Draining Motivation?

You can’t force motivation, but you can create conditions that help it flourish. Let’s get down to the nitty-gritty of those conditions, drawing from mod...

The Illusion of Authority: The Position Myth

Often, emerging leaders believe that authority comes from a job title, thinking that a promotion will instantly command respect and compliance from their teams. This myth can be particularly damaging for newcomers who may feel powerless without a formal designation, hindering their ability to influence and lead effectively from the start. Conversely, established leaders might rely too heavily on their titles, potentially stunting their ability to lead and connect authentically with their teams.

Leadership is not derived from titles but from the actions and decisions one makes. True leadership means stepping beyond the confines of job descriptions to actively shape a positive, impactful environment.

The Misplaced Faith in Information: The Knowledge Myth

Emerging leaders often fall into the trap of equating information hoarding with leadership capability, mistakenly believing that an abundance of knowledge alone will establish their leader...