The Power to Choose: How Resilience Shapes Your Success

One conversation can change everything.

The phone rings. You expect just another call. Instead, a single sentence shatters your reality—your future, rewritten in an instant.

You can’t always control what happens. But you can always control what comes next. I don’t just believe this—I’ve lived it.

When Life Throws a Curveball

Twenty years ago, I thought I was on the right path. Then, out of nowhere, I lost my job. One conversation and it was gone—the career I had built was erased in an instant.

At first, I froze. My mind raced with worst-case scenarios. The panic was so consuming that I got lost on my drive home—on a route I had driven for over five years. That’s how disoriented I was. The weight of uncertainty was crushing.

But then, through the noise of my thoughts, a single realization broke through:

I still have a choice.

I could stay stuck in frustration, or I could take control. My wife, friends, and family reminded me of who I was. And in that moment, I decided:

This setback won’t define me. I will rewrite my story.

Viktor Frankl: Choosing Meaning and Choice

Most of us will never face the horrors Viktor Frankl endured. Yet in that darkness, he uncovered a universal truth—one that applies to every challenge, big or small.

In Man’s Search for Meaning, Frankl described the horrors of Nazi concentration camps—losing his family, enduring forced labor, and witnessing countless deaths. Every day was a gamble for survival.

Yet even in those conditions, Frankl realized something profound:

💡 While he couldn’t control the cruelty around him, he could control his response.

He saw that those who lost hope deteriorated quickly, while those who held onto meaning—through love, purpose, or acts of humanity—were able to endure. Frankl chose to believe that if he survived, he would teach others what he had learned. That choice to focus on purpose became his lifeline.
Frankl wrote, “When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.”

The Formula for Resilience

Jack Canfield, in The Success Principles, simplifies this idea with a powerful formula:

E + R = O (Event + Response = Outcome)

You can’t always control the event.

But you can always control your response—and that response shapes your outcome.

Yet most of us react without thinking.

Marshall Goldsmith, in Triggers, explains how our environment influences us to respond on autopilot. Stress, frustration, and unexpected challenges act as triggers, tempting us to react emotionally instead of intentionally.

Real growth happens in the space between the trigger and the response—where we choose who we want to be.

Every Day, Life Gives You That Choice

Your team spends months on a project, only for leadership to scrap it at the last minute. Frustration creeps in. Why even try? You could let resentment fester, or you could step back, learn, and turn it into fuel for your next big win.

Then comes the big presentation. You prepare, you deliver… and silence. Blank stares. Maybe I’m just not good at this. You could let it define your self-worth, or you could study the feedback, refine your approach, and come back stronger.

You’re expecting a promotion—but instead, someone else gets it. A mix of anger, confusion, and self-doubt floods your mind. I deserved this. What now? You could let bitterness take over, or you could use it as motivation to sharpen your skills and make yourself undeniable next time.
Then comes a personal moment—your partner or spouse makes a hurtful comment in an argument. The sting of their words lingers. You replay it in your head. Why would they say that? You could let it harden into resentment, or you could pause, seek understanding, and respond with intention rather than reaction.

No matter the hardship—whether in personal struggles or life’s most unthinkable circumstances—there is always a choice.

Frankl once witnessed a fellow prisoner give away his last piece of bread—an act of defiance in the face of suffering. Even when stripped of everything, that man still had the power to choose generosity over selfishness.

We may not be in a concentration camp, but daily life presents us with moments that test our patience, resilience, and character.

The question is—how will you respond?

Who Do You Choose to Be?

The next time life throws something unexpected at you, stop and ask:

“Who do I want to be right now?”

Because what happens to you isn’t the story. Who you choose to be because of it—that’s the real story.

Remember: you always have the power to choose.

The power is yours. The choice is yours. So… what will you choose today?